AFTER MUCH SUFFERING, I WILL DIE ALONE!"
The prospect of dying alone tore at Jacinta's heart, and Lucia tried to comfort her:
"Don't think about that!"
"Let me think about it, because the more I think about it, the more I suffer.
And I want to suffer for the love of Our Lord and for sinners, and then I don't care.
Our Lady will take me to Heaven!"
To what extent did Jacinta's ardor for mortification reach!
After having subjected her body to all possible sacrifices, she even mortified her intellect with thoughts repugnant to nature.
She is a living host, pure suffering in the totality of her being.
Once, she repeated, a little more animated:
"And there I am, suffering alone! But it doesn't matter!
I suffer for the love of Our Lord, to repair the Immaculate Heart of Mary, for the conversion of sinners and for the Holy Father!"...
The worry of dying alone did not leave her.
Let's listen to another moving fact:
"One day, I found her embracing a picture of Our Lady and saying:
"Oh my little Mother in Heaven, so I will die alone?"
To encourage her, I said:
"What does it matter if you die alone, if Our Lady is going to take you?"
"That's true. It doesn't matter at all.
But I don't know how it is.
Sometimes I don't remember that She will take me.
I only remember that I will die without you being by my side."